Saturday, April 30, 2011

Being hard on myself

I have come so far and I know I've got a long way to go still, but I think its important for me to take some time to really let this all soak in and realize what an accomplishment it is to have gotten to where I'm at. Lately I feel myself seeing all these changes and being so excited that I've made them but the first thoughts in my head immediately afterwards are okay now just 5 more here and 10 more there and I can keep looking better and better. I feel like what I've done so far isn't good enough.

I think we are all too hard on ourselves, but at the same time i think its just because we are so frustrated with ourselves because we see where we are at and know that we could be doing better. We just havent figured out a way to get there, yet.

I'm working on getting there. And its true, where I'm at is still not healthy so its not exactly 'good enough'. But I'm not giving up or quitting. I just think that if this was anyone else, I would be telling them how beautiful they are and how amazing all their efforts so far have been. I'd tell them to be proud of where they've come from and to not worry so much about the end result because it's the journey in life that really matters, not the destination. In the end, we all die. The same theory should apply to any journeys we take though. Enjoy the ride...

I should be giving myself the same respect I give others. It's a little easier said than done sometimes but I'm going to try harder to do this more often.

Tuesday, April 26, 2011

Amazing what putting your mind to work can do

It truly amazes me how putting forth a little extra effort can give you a whole lot of results. I used to feel like all I had to do was the physical if I wanted to see a change, and that is hard all on its own. But I've really come to understand its sooo much more than that. Putting your mind in the right place should be the absolute first step in any life changing decision you are going to make for yourself. It sounds so easy when you put it that way, almost as if you feel stupid for not thinking of it right off the bat. However, its not as easy as it sounds. In fact, its a lot more difficult.

I am very proud of how far I've come in such a little amount of time and I have so many influences to thank for this. I think the most important ones though are the ones that affect how my mind thinks and approaches this new challenge in my life. It's very easy for me to tell someone that they need to get their mind in the right place to go on this journey to a healthier lifestyle. It's very hard to explain how to do that. I'm not really sure I can. Its probably just one of those things in life that take time to realize...

Anyways... :)

I am soooo excited today! I finally reached 229 lbs! I have been saying for years now that I would give anything to be back in the 220s range like I was before I was pregnant. I would look at old pictures of myself and think man, I was a lot prettier than I gave myself credit for and I should have had more confidence back then because of it. I would think about how much of a huge blob I had become since then and just get depressed and keep wishing I knew how to change back to the old me. Well I'm so happy I've made it to the 220s! Just 4 more lbs and I will be at my pre-pregnancy weight exactly. I can't wait to say, wow I haven't looked this good and been this healthy in over 3 years!

The closer I get to these smaller goals of mine, the more real it feels that I could be at my goal weight in less than 1 years time. I'm feeling amazing today and going to kick butt on all my workouts and push just that much harder! Going to keep eating right and not let myself get distracted by things that don't really matter. :)

Sunday, April 24, 2011

Happy Easter!

Been a busy last few days with all the Easter stuff going on around here but I've still managed to keep up with exercising. That kickboxing thing is really kicking my ass. but I love it. I'm always pouring sweat when its all over with, lol.

Yesterday was my mom's birthday and while she was out having lunch and a movie with my dad I was to make her birthday cake. Of course it was too tempting not to sample the mix and the frosting. ugh! I havent eaten cake since before I started all this and so of course the second I could see and smell it I was like OMG cake! lol. Then they get home and I find out they went to red lobster and they brought back a huge ass sack full of left over cheddar biscuits and the most chocolately tripple chocolate huge slice of cake i've ever seen. Told me to take a bite to try it and I couldnt refuse that. lol. I had one of the cheddar biscuits even though I tried to talk myself out of it. I said screw it because I get to eat anything from red lobster maybe once in 3 years at most. hah. Then Jett starting bringin me piles of easter candy to open for him and of course i didnt want him to eat that much at once so i only gave him a few pieces and while im sitting around watching one of our new netflix movies i find myself mindless noming the other candies he left in my lap! So needless to say, yesterday's eating habits did me in. I was down to 230 and hoping to be at 229 today but after eating all that I figured I'd not be there yet. I wasnt sure how bad it was but stepped no the scale today and it was up 3 lbs! ugh!!! but i worked my butt off in today's workouts and have been eating perfectly all day so far, and checked my weight again, im already back down a little over a pound. So hopefully with a little extra hard work it won't take me too long to get back to where I was. Thankfully I am not taking it as hard as I did this last time. I think its because I know aunt flow is due any day now and i've been craving sweets all week so I figured I was bound to be up a little at some point. lol.

Anyways, heres to kicking ass the rest of today and keeping it up tomorrow. :)

Wednesday, April 20, 2011

Holy hell..

My eyes bugged out of my head when I saw I had gone down 2 lbs just from yesterday! lmfao. I wont discuss here why I believe this happened. But I will say I it probably had something to do with some extra unexpected cardio, haha. Either way I'm happy. 231 today which is 5 lbs down from last week. crazy! Only 6 more lbs to go until I finally reach my pre-pregnancy weight for the first time in over 3 years.

Tuesday, April 19, 2011

40 lbs and counting...

Yeah you heard me... 40 lbs dropped! woot woot!

Finally. lol. This last week or two I have been getting so close and then messing things up and going back up and then coming down and going up. lol. But I know what I was doing wrong and I know why. So I'm learning and working on those things and finally getting back to going down steady again instead of all this up and down nonsense. :)

I'm so excited!

Monday, April 18, 2011

Change is for the better

Changing things up again. Tried a new workout today. It's another one I found on instant play form netflix that is by 10 Minute Solutions. It's called Kickboxing Bootcamp and has 5 - 10 minute workouts to help you get fit and lose weight while learning some awesome kickboxing moves.

I absolutely loved it! I don't know why I didn't try it sooner. I've had it sitting on my netflix for a while now but been sticking to my 2 favorite workouts... started getting bored with them and tired of the same few things so decided it was time to switch it up again and try a new one. I am so glad I did. Nothing like trying something new and learning new moves to keep up my motivation. I ought to know better, next time I start feeling bored I'll have to remember to try some fresh new workouts I havent tried yet. :)

Saturday, April 16, 2011

It's beautiful outside today.

Walked 30 minutes to the lake. swam across it to the other side to play with some other kids for awhile then swam back across and walked 30 more minutes back home. Woot! :) Just finished up an hour of at home workouts too. I feel good today.

Friday, April 15, 2011

3 months!

Finally made it to the 3 month mark. It's only seemed like forever to get here. lol. I had dropped 38 lbs by last saturday but at today's weigh in I was still up a pound from earlier this week so at 3 months I am officially at 37 pounds dropped.

Starting measurement > Newest one > Amount lost

Bust - 51 in > 46 in > 5 in
Waist - 53 in > 47 in > 6 in
Hips - 58 in > 52 in > 6 in
Arms - 17 in > 15.5 in > 1.5 in
Thighs - 31 in > 28 in > 3 in
Calves - 19.5 in > 18.5 in > 1 in
Neck - 16.5 > 14.5 > 2 in

And now pics! I am actually finally starting to see a difference!

This last picture here is an extra one i took of myself tonight and then i edited it so i could visualize for myself what i may look like when i thin down a bit. I know its not gonna be exact of course. But this is a really great motivator for me to be able to see the possibilities. :)


Thursday, April 14, 2011

Dragging ass

Yup... thats how I feel lately. I've been draggin ass the last few days. lol. Not been doing too great on the eating or the exercising which is really stupid because the only reason for me to go off track was because I saw the scale go up a little tiny bit and it depressed me so much I got off track. Now that's just ridiculous and I know it. I was doing so well going down a pound a day there over the weekend and down to 235 but today after 2 days of moping around i am back up to 237. Blah!

But I am lucky its not higher considering how poorly I ate last night. Oh man... it was so bad! but I got myself back on track today and worked my butt off. Still wasnt feeling the greatest, but better than before.

I just checked Liz's blog though and she extended the weightloss contest she was holding for one more month! Those who joined sent in pictures and weight and measurements back in January and the contest was supposed to end April 20th, but now its open til May 20th. So this brings me all new motivation to get back on track and kick it in to high gear so I can drop as many more pounds as possible in just over a months time. I'm feeling good about that and think if I can keep my mind in the right place I can really give some of those other contestants a run for their money! :)

lol. I honestly have no idea where the other contestants are at though so we'll see...

Sunday, April 10, 2011

Playing with my son

So one of my bigger end goals I've been wanting to reach is being able to play with my son and not be too tired or too fat to do all the things he wants to do with me.

I feel good because I am well on my way to being completely there. I can feel my energy levels are way higher than ever before and I'm getting out and doing so much more with him. It makes me really happy when I can say yeah sure I'll do that instead of telling him sorry honey mommy's too big to fit in that tunnel or slide down that slide, etc.

On Wednesday we went to Mcdonalds so he could play there and run out some excess energy he had. For the first time since I was a little girl, I felt like I could go up inside of there and not worry about getting stuck or hurting my knees or back or whatever. And for the most part, I did. :) It was still a bit scruffy on the knees, lol. But I crawled right on up those tunnels and Jett followed me up to the very top. He was too scared to go by himself so mommy led the way to the big twisty slide. :D He laughed and giggled the whole time, thoroughly enjoying that mommy came inside to play with him. It made my day, too.

Today we went walking... well I walked. He sat in the stroller while I pushed. lol. When we came to a hill he started chanting - Mommy go FASTER! and so I did. I jogged and pushed his happy butt all the way down one street and then again down another. I was panting and totally out of breath by the end of it all. But I still did it. :) Someday I'll be able to do it and not have to be completely out of breath when it's all over.

Friday, April 8, 2011

Caught my dinner today!

In other news... I went fishing today and caught 2 catfish! Everyone who came with all caught at least one fish. Jett even helped catch 2 catfish! For the longest time he had me beat 2 to none. I though I was gonna have to go home hanging my head in shame. bwahahah. After throwing back the non catfish and losing 2 that we had tied together that swam off with our stake, lol, we brought home 7 total and all ate very well tonight! We baked them and seasoned them with lemon pepper and lemon juice. It was sooo delicious!

I wish I brought sunscreen though. I don't think any of us realized we were spending 5 hours out there and didn't know we were sunburned until we made it home and finally started to feel it. hah. oh well. There is lots of aloe here to take care of it.

I only exercised 30 minutes so far but plan on getting another 30 minutes in before bed. Nonetheless I stepped on the scale and am down another pound again today, so now I'm at 237. Woohoo! :)

Simple diet and exercise plan.

So I just got a message from a stranger but it seems helpful so I thought I'd post it here to share with ya'll.


Start with one of these:

2 eggs

4 egg whites

1 cup skim milk

3 slice of turkey bacon

1 cup low fat cottage cheese

1 chicken sausage

Then add 1 of these:

1 slice whole wheat bread

1 cup oatmeal

1 cup mixed berries

1 apple

2 tomato slices

1/2 multi grain bagel

1 cup of whole grain total

1/2 grapefruit


Start with 1 of these:

5oz chicken breast

5oz turkey breast

5oz low sodium tuna

5oz fresh fish

5 oz lean red meat

Then add 1 of these:

1 cup brown rice

1 small sweet potato

1/2 cup black beans

1/2 brown rice pasta

1/2 cup white beans

1/2 cup quinoa

1 artichoke


Start with 1 of these:

1/2 cup hummus

20 raw almonds

1 low fat mozzarella stick

2 table spoons almond butter

1/2 cup black bean dip

1 cup low fat yogurt

1/2 cup low fat cottage cheese

Then add 1 of these:

unlimited carrot sticks

unlimited celery sticks

unlimited blueberries

1 apple

20 corn chips

1/4 avocado


start with 1 of these:

4oz grilled fish

4oz chicken breast

5 large shrimp

5oz broiled pork chops

4oz grilled lamb

4oz turkey breast

5oz scallops

Then add 1 of these:

steam broccoli salad no dressing


brussel sprouts

mixed veggies

1/2 cup carrots

1/2 cup barley

I know you don't know me but i saw your post on the I used to be fat website. I'm sending you my diet because I want to help others. On July 6th 2010, I weighed 338 lbs. Today I weigh 199.5 lbs. If your interested I can send you an exercise plan as well. I hope you reach your goal!

and then i asked about his workout and this is what he said...

30 min power walk

15 mins on a stair-master

25 mins on the exercise bike or the elliptical

Follow the diet.
That's your plan for the 1st 90 days.


I think all in all those sound like really good tips and advice for most anyone looking to lose some weight. I don't have access to those exercise machines but I'm doing 2 hours a day of workout videos or walking/joggin around the neighborhood pushing my kid in the stroller so I feel like I'm still getting plenty of exercise. I don't really care to completely limit what I eat so I try to just count my calories instead. But I think that the meal plan is a really good idea for those of us who need some structure or just can't think of anything good to eat. :)

Wednesday, April 6, 2011

Not morbid anymore! :)

I am freaking stoked about today's weigh-in. I have been hovering at 240 lbs for daysssss and its been bugging me like crazy. Today I finally dropped out of the 240s into the 230s and made it to 238 lbs! Three pounds down from last week! Which officially makes me at a 35 lb weight loss since Jan 15th and now my BMI is under 40. So I am no longer considered 'Morbidly Obese'. Now I'm just 'Obese'. hahaha. I know that sounds like a weird thing to be excited about, but I am nonetheless. :)

Sunday, April 3, 2011

Moving along

I'm slowly inching my way forward and continuing to progress. I'm at 240 lbs now and been doing plenty of exercise. My biggest hurdle is eating right whenever I'm gone from the house for too long. I'll slip and say well I can have a little of this and then I'm like well I had a little of this so it wont be so bad if I have a little of that and then the day spirals downward. But I'm still firm in believing that every day is a new chance to right my wrongs and improve my choices. I got lucky yesterday in that while we were out all day long, we were at the zoo so we walked and walked and walked for hours on end. Lots of good healthy cardio to burn all the extra calories I was eating. However if I had just ate well I could be burning the fat that is already on my body. Thinking about it now jsut gives me more drive to want to do better next time though.

I got a chance to video chat with Marci from IUTBF on Friday night. She was able to answer some more of our questions and it was really cool to just talk to her as if we were face to face. She's a very real and normal, even typical, 19 year old girl. We discussed things about the show and then moved on to plenty of other fun topics and all in all, she's a really awesome girl. She even mentioned right off the bat when she saw me come in the chatroom that she recognized my name and saw me always posting on her page and the other cast members and the IUTBF facebook too. lol. So that was cool that she sorta knew who I was. Jett popped up in the background of my camera a few times and she had to say how cute he was. lol. Once I finally figured out my microphone problems and got to talking she commented on my voice saying 'No wonder you've got a baby, with a sexy voice like that it'd be hard not to if someone was alone in the dark with you.' hahah. I had a great time talking with her and the few other fans who popped in to the room, but I stayed up way too late and was tired all day at the zoo Saturday. lol.

Friday, April 1, 2011

Ladies Day out!

So yesterday I spent most all day and night with my two best and closest friends. I picked up Ashley and on our way to Tyler we stopped in Athens to see a guy friend of mine who offered to cook us all lunch. It was good food and great company. Really wonderful to see him again and how well he is doing now. After that we made it to Angie's house and started off our day doing some shopping. We browsed a few different shops and got some really cool stuff. We were running low on time and decided to skip bowling but we did stop and play 18 holes of putt putt golf. Ashley had never played it before and so we got to show her the ropes. lol. Leanette met up with us and then we went to Cici's for a quick bit of dinner before returning to Angie's place to change clothes. Got ourselves all ready to go and then headed out to the club for Ladies Night. After a few drinks we worked up the courage to get our butts on the dance floor and tried to learn a few new moves from those around us. lol. All in all it was a great time and even though I didn't eat as well as I normally would, I still got plenty of exercise throughout the day and burned tons of calories away.

Today when I checked my weight the scale said I had dropped another pound and a half. Woohoo! :) Went for a nice long walk around the neighborhood and just enjoyed all the beautiful weather we're finally having again. It's warmed back up and the clouds have all gone away. Tomorrow we'll be headed to the zoo and gonna walk all over that place too while it's still so nice out.