So I have been fairly good to myself most of my journey when I'm eating at home and not having too many problems with wanting the bad things because i will either have a little bit to satisfy the craving and then go fill up on veggies or fruits or something or I will be able to substitute what i want for something similar. This has worked great and I'm sure it still will but last night I cracked.
Been under a lot of stress this past week, which is no excuse for poor eating, in fact its just the opposite. It should mean that I should eat my best to keep my mind healthy and happy. But yesterday evening I broke down and binged on all the leftover candy from the party bags for my son's birthday party. Luckily there wasn't a huge bag full of it left because my stick of a brother with a metabolism faster than the speed of light ate most of it before leaving here on Sunday. lol. However, I'm sitting here now face to face with the candy wrappers and evidence of last night's total breakdown.
In 7 months I haven't hardly craved any candy. It's not even looked appealing to me. I will have a chocolate here and there. Usually the weight watchers chocolates or the skinny cow ones, but hard candy hasn't looked the least bit delicious. Then I made this spectacular Treasure Chest cake for my son's Pirate themed 3rd birthday...
I managed not to devour everything in sight that day somehow.. lol. but 2 days later the leftover gobstoppers and tootsie roll pops and tootsie rolls were calling my name! I ate the entire rest of the box of gobstoppers and I had 3 suckers and like 5 tootsie rolls and a (surprisingly sugarfree) ring pop. I felt like a huge cow but I knew if I left any gobstoppers in the box i would want them today or whatever and I just didnt want to ruin tomorrow before it even got here. lol. Lame reason again, but here it is tomorrow and I'm eating well and doing fine. I don't have the desire to eat any candy now but I also don't have the temptation. :)
Anyways... I knew last night as I was eating all the candy that I wanted to come clean with myself and my blogger friends and share how awful I was to myself. We can't be perfect always and this isn't just a diet to me. This is my new lifestyle! So whenever I have a bad day I'm going to share it just as much as whenever I have a good day. It's realistic to see there are both sides to the coin of struggling to get to a healthier me.
In other, much better, news!.. today is Weigh in Wednesday and I am down 3 lbs this week. I was stuck at 193 all weekend and then came down to 191 on yesterday and down another pound to 190 today! haha. I think maybe my body was craving a change in the foods I had been eating or something so maybe the cake and hot dogs at the birthday party and whatnot weren't all so bad.
And just for fun here is a picture of me from Jett's 2nd birthday party....
I had no neck. My fat head sat on my blob of shoulders. lol
And this was at this year's party. I actually have a collar bone showing through in this picture. There is a neck and veins. Whoa! lol
Oh snap... I've still got a nice round booty, too. :P
My boobs may be shrinking, but at least so is my waistline!
And this is my bestie Ashley who helped me throw everything together. <3 She's like 120 on a fat day so I know I'll probably never be her size, but I'm gonna get damn close enough to at least share a few cute clothes!! haha
and one of the birthday boy because he's too cute not to share! :)